13 Signs Your "Relationship Love" Is Nearly Dead
Life is all about relationships and how we engage or disengage within the full scope and spectrum of them. From the moment we are born into this physical world, we are introduced to our first relationship; that is, our first encounter with a real, live, human being. People have call these humans, mom and dad, yet, nowadays, we have casually morphed and have adopted many other names, however, in the end, no matter what humans call themselves in relation to relationships, they are a mere displaying of temporary titles. A title is simply a title; an adoption of some word that feels comfortable depending on who's wearing the title at the time.
Now, before we move on, I'm letting you know straight up that these words were channeled and shared based on my former experiences in my own personal relationships from the past. Today, I am opening myself up to vulnerability for those who find themselves here. Let's just say, I've been through relationship dysfunction on countless levels, and in turn, once robbed myself of remembering my true identity.
My former relationship experiences woke me up to the darkness of dysfunction within me, birthing myself into new awareness's of infinite light for my soul's journey and purpose. So here I AM . . . raw, real, and vulnerable. I pray you are blessed to know, you are not alone on your journey and that no matter what, you are capable of being and receiving so much love, more than you might realize in this moment.
Let me begin by stating, "Your name is a title, yet, it is not who you are." You've been lied to. Your job is a title, yet, it is not who you are. You may even describe your various quirky stages of relationships with titles; like monogamous, married, common law, polyamorous, polygamous, straight, gay, lesbian, bi, among other names, yet, even these scattered array of relationships, are not who you are. Overall, it's such a mixed up mess were are all in, within ourselves, and also, with those we call others. No matter how you identify yourself and your relationship with yourself and others, it is not who you are.
Humanity is acting out of character. We are playing out countless levels of dramatic scenes of forgetfulness, yet, while we are on this physical plane, and within these physical bodies, apparently, our playing out these relationships is part of a complex equation of life.
We tend to fade in and out of various roles depending on what kind of relationship we are in, yet for the purpose of this article, let's focus on the term, "codependent," a term or title that humans give to unhealthy relationships that are out of alignment, harmony, or balance. In other terms we could say that codependency can also be described as when individuals assign someone else the responsibility for their happiness, which is an impossible task for anyone to accomplish for anyone. Codependent," is just another title to describe types of relationships that are in need of repair, yet in this article that you find yourself reading; to repair, is to remember what you have forgotten about your true self, or what we will refer to as your divine self.
Even if you intrinsically know that you are spiritually divine through and through, in this physical reality, a codependent relationship can leave one feeling unfulfilled, frustrated, used, abused, manipulated, and controlled, leaving one's soul spiritually deformed and deflated. In such circumstances one may feel emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually exhausted, yet, even so, many in this cycle continue on a path of denial, ignoring the signs that point away from the richness of their heart and the remembering of their true identity. It's the very definition of spiritual sabotage and bondage.
Perhaps you feel like life has taken you for a ride that promised to be filled with irresistible excitement and fun, yet once strapped in, you found yourself going in a direction that you had no intentions of going, yet, you went anyway. You got on the ride, and stayed, going around and around and around, cycle after cycle, after cycle . . . and NOW . . . you've decided you want off! The question is . . . "How does one stop a ride that someone else seems to have control over and who's in control of the ride of life anyway?"
In a humorous sort of way, life is a riddle that's riddled with complexity, yet, also opportunities to rise up and experience a portion of who we really are in a world that is constantly changing the very definition of what a healthy and balanced relationship is.
Intervention is needed to reclaim those portions of you that you've forgotten, ignored, or abandoned, and you are the only one who has the power to choose to intervene on behalf of yourself and your divine destiny.
Part of finding your way back to you is being able to recognize when the ride isn't what it initially promised to be. Sometimes we get so used to the feel of the ride, we stop noticing the bumps, the wobbles, and the uneasy feelings screaming deep down inside.
So what kind of "relationship ride" are you questioning right now? Below you will find a series of signs that could indicate that the "codependent ride" you've been on is about to expire, depending on your choice to stay on the ride or get off the ride.
Before you begin, take a moment to close your eyes, and connect with a power that you feel comfortable with to request support and direction during this revealing exercise.
For example, you can call in the presence of God, angels, ascended masters, or spiritual guides to lovingly guide and support you. You can ask for the courage to see, the wisdom to know and the vision to change. Ask to be shown the relationship that your heart is currently questioning right now. After doing so, take a deep breath and invite your mind and heart to be open for insights, inspiration, and direction.
Answer the following statements (yes or no) to the best of your emotional ability and spiritual integrity.
1. Codependent Sign - Controlling/Manipulating: You, the other person, or both engaged in the relationship, appear to be bordering along the lines of obsession about what the other person is doing. Daily questions, pressuring, prodding, nagging, and complaining feel like a criminal interrogation. It feels uncomfortable as your integrity is constantly being questioned. Individuals who take on these behaviors tend to question actions, thoughts, feelings, or intentions of the other individual even if things seem to be going well.
In relationship situations, constant suspicion tends to be the underlying current of energy. As a result, the relationship can feel smothering, needy, controlling, and obsessive.
My Personal Experience: Several years ago in one of my former marriages my husband would want to know where I was, what I was doing, right down to controlling my daily activities. It was easy to for this him to manipulate me due to my own insecurities and lack of self worth. The truth is, he never had power over me. It was I that gave my power away. After a difficult situation erupted, I finally stepped into courage. While 8 months pregnant, and with a 5 year old and 3 year old at my side, I left the relationship and went into the temporary refuge of a woman's' shelter. Little did I know that it was just the beginning of a series of painful relationships yet to follow.
Thankfully, now I am my own navigator now with a personal guidance system that leads me every step of the way. I don't always see the next step, yet, I act in faith, trusting that I am on my way to knowing the deeper parts of myself. The light within me, shines a new path that keeps expanding toward new horizons. I see a horizon filled with beautiful souls just like me, and just like you. What do you see as you take your daily steps toward you?